Day 288: Nepotism, Alive and Well

Well, I’m in the Caribbean. It is unbelievably beautiful. Hot, relaxing, turquoise.

Rainy…

boooooooooooo…………

Kelly from Kenya’s family has an apartment in the Turks and Caicos islands which is UNBELIEVABLY nice and swanky and Caribbean-like. It is technically British, and I used my passport to get here, but we use American dollars and plugs, and everything is easy as can be for the tourists who are willing to pay and provide any kind of employment for the much less well-off islanders. I hate this element of tourist attractions, especially since this particularly strong dichotomy between the tourist and the tourist-tender tends to occur in places where natural beauty and bounty is at its highest.

However, I cannot claim to no enjoy myself. Even when it’s rainy, we spend our day in the hot tub talking about girly things and sipping on smoothies.

What is not fabulous is the Miss Turks and Caicos pageant. Which we watched last night to the snorting of obnoxious boston girls everywhere.

Let’s see…we could start with a discussion of how all the contestants had to fan themselves on stage because it was clearly too hot in the streamer and balloon decorated high school gym. Or the fact that they paced back and forth for twenty minutes or so to repeating music in the absence of a real commercial break. Or some laughter at how the former Miss Turks and Ciacos peoples’ hair kept getting caught on the current Miss Turks and Caicos’ crown every time she congratulated them on competing. Or a commentary on the HORRIFIC commentating that happened…or a nod to the fact that the pageant was run by a Mrs. Been, last year was won by Miss Been, and then AGAIN won by a DIFFERENT Miss Been. Seriously…the nepotism was out of control.

But highly enjoyable to watch. Kelly and I kept falling asleep and then waking to the sound of the other snorting with laughter at a dress, pose, or commentator’s stray hand. I am worried about these girls and their voyage toward Miss Universe, which is their next stop after exiting the gym with the door that slams in each contestants’ face. But I did learn…for example: What “unites the Turks and Caicos Islanders”? Well, what else but “the fact that they are all from the Turks and Caicos Islands!!!” as one contestant proudly proclaimed into her dead microphone.