Day 434: Stomach Clinic Restaurant

by claire a. williams,
Last year, when we were travelling the world, we came up with a brilliant idea. These moments happen very often in our lives, because of our innate brilliance, and thus it was nothing out of ordinary. The idea, the brilliant one, was for someone to make a book of all the nonsensical signs in the world. We marvelled at our brilliance for a few solid minutes until it was pointed out by something factual [a person (?), a bookstore (?), the internet (?) - the source escapes me] that we were not the first to envision such an idea. And, not being the first, and given that another book already existed, our book had very little chance of selling. Because probably anyone who wanted to look at a funny sign in a book bought the book the first time around.
On our four day trip to the Masai Mara with the Hope Runs volunteers, I readjusted my stance on need for such a sequel when we passed Stomach Clinic Restaurant. As the Masai Mara safari continued, and we saw lions, cheetahs, elephants, and rhinos, and a couple of us caught a stomach bug and vomited for 24 hours, and our newest volunteer arrivals entered day 8 without luggage, I saw some more heartwarming signs that made me proud of the fine use of the English language the worldwide:
End Point Bar
Tusker Beer: Making Everyone Equal
Dimples Restaurant
Keratina Express Bus: Only Time Will Tell
And some good memories from last year:
(at a zoo): This cage is being old and small and is to be demolished.
(at a park): Office of the Tree Authority

1 comment:

Radioactive Jam said...

I would order such a book. Same for "Urphanisms."

You *are* planning to collect things like Black Crayon etc. into book form, yes?

And I just read Jane's unforgettable story and I gotta say... um. I need a little help with the ending.

Also the middle.

Because just when I think I've figured it out, it slips away and I'm left - well, wondering. Did Monicah get eaten by lions? Or did she get the ripe mango while her sister got eaten? Or nothing like anything even resembling what I said?

Hello insomnia.

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