I am in bed with Kelly after a fabulous birthday party catching up with old high school friends. I say in bed with Kelly in the most strictly platonic way, despite anything her mother may think after seeing that I casually called her "lover" in an email subject (unbeknownst to her, things were a bit tense around the house for a couple of weeks). Happily, Lara is able to say everything inappropriately, such as telling the four people at my dinner party that they were all together because "I have no real friends" which was more a commentary on the fact that I hadn't seen two of the four of them in months than the fact that I do not value them etc etc.
Sigh. This is usually the point when Claire has to interject to tell me to "get it together." Instead Kelly just told me that I'm horrifically bad at interacting with people for someone so generally outgoing.
But today was one of those Good Days in a lot of ways, though like every Good Day it really wasn't that great for much of it.
In what I believe will prove to be a continuing issue as I age, I don't quite know how to deal with the fact that I'm turning twenty-five. I strongly subscribe to the birthday's aren't a big deal, numbers mean sh#@, and life is what you make it school of thought. Still, I'm getting bombarded with people telling me I'm old, that I'm not really in my early twenties anymore, that this was when they stopped fooling around and got their lives together etc. etc. And it does seem that for all our talk, most of our friends have it figured out. Two of them are even married, for goodness' sake. and pretty much everyone has a career.
For all that, it doesn't feel epic, so I have decided it is not epic. Lying in bed the night after a birthday party of people asking meaningful questions like they feel they should on big occasions, though it always quickly derails into gossip and talks about dating, I always decide that this is the year I will start a contemplative birthday tradition like a long walk in the woods, hour of journal writing etc. etc. but I think this is finally the birthday that I have realized that such things aren't me, that I will continue taking it as it comes, and sort of take a general assessment of whether I'm happy or not and go from there. And aside from one problematic moment in my day on a theme I've gotten used to, I have decided that things are good--healthy happy blah blah blah--so I will keep going. To Kenya and beyond.
But thank you to everyone who wished me happy birthday...it is twenty-five, but as Claire said, it's truly same-same but different from every other day in the rest of my life. I always leave the birthday pedestal feeling like they are just like New Years, declaring a major, getting into college, and hopefully NO other major moments in life: a lot of build-up for basically another day. All that aside, though...it was fun being feted quite so many times, and the eggless cake element of the event (since I don't eat the oeufs) is always a yearly highlight. And let's not lie...who doesn't love presents? Even ones bought at the Newport, NH boutiques of WalMart, KMart and Huberts.
4 comments:
Belated Happy Birthday. Ask me, I am 27 and still behave like a 10 year old according to my mom. Have fun.
Drop into my blog for some unique birthday gift and party ideas.
And those penguins are adorable.
Don't worry about what age you are! It sounds really cheesy, but just follow your dreams and be happy that way. I'm in my mid-30s, travelling around [as often as possible], and really enjoying my life. Most of my friends are jealous, and I'm not jealous of the ones with the static life of job/relationship/buy a home/get a dog/have a kid. The best advice I can give is just to be comfortable with who you are, and be happy that way. In the end, you'll be the one all your friends are jealous of, when they're living 'traditional' lives, and you're out there following your dreams and having grand new adventures and experiences. Sorry if this sounds cheesy or cliche, but in my experience, it's very true. So, happy birthday! and don't worry about your age and what you "should" be doing. It's the people that break expectations that are the most interesting, notable and remembered.
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btw, happy birthday:)
25 is a good age, I kind of miss it (I'm 26 now) - I liked that it was a square number. And just think, you won't hit another one for 11 more years!! 26 is boring but I'm kind of excited about 27 (cube). Yes I'm a math geek.
Sue (not the Sue you know - another one, from Maine)
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